


The Shower Cubicle Conundrum

by TriplePirouette



Series: Soapy Smut [2]
Category: Big Bang Theory
Genre: F/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-04-22
Updated: 2009-04-22
Packaged: 2017-10-29 22:29:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/324861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TriplePirouette/pseuds/TriplePirouette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sheldon, Penny, a shower and smut. Originally written for Paradox's April Kink Meme for a few prompts and as a continuation of "The Laundry Room Exhibition"</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Shower Cubicle Conundrum

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published April 2009, has not been edited since.
> 
> this is a continuation of my reply to the prompt 'laundry room sex' in "The Laundry Room Exhibition" This also fulfills several other suggested kinks, including shower sex, Sheldon's first Blow Job, and mentions Pi. :) Lots of birds, one stone.

  
"Bend over, please."   
  
Sheldon stepped into the shower behind Penny, watching as the steamy water cascaded down her naked skin. She bit her lip, looking slyly over her shoulder when he spoke. "Oh, kinky!" She turned, hands splayed against the wall and stuck out her butt towards him with her feet spread wide and wiggled her hips back and forth. She looked over her shoulder expectantly.   
  
"Not quite," Sheldon said, standing straight and forcing himself to tear his gaze away from how the water cascaded perfectly over her ass. He reached out his hand, wetting the plush yellow face cloth he held. "Would you prefer cucumber melon or vanilla cream?"   
  
Penny turned back to him, serious. "Surprise me. Sheldon, you do know that I suggested this as more about us being naked and wet together than actually getting clean, right?"   
  
He poured a dollop of vanilla cream onto her bright towel, looking at it as he pursed his lips together, trying to figure out how to explain this to her.    
  
Penny put her hands on his shoulders, fighting for him to meet her gaze when he's been quiet and inactive for much longer than she'd expected. "Sheldon? What's up? Do you want to get out?"   
  
"No!" Sheldon snapped, looking up at her. "No," he said much more softly, but his jaw was ticking something furious. She waited for him to continue, letting her hands work up and down over his shoulders. "In the amount of time that it took us to return to your apartment, and then for me to smuggle a clean set of clothing out of my apartment without Leonard noticing, I was able to review our encounter three times. I kept thinking of how unsanitary those washing machines must be. The thought wouldn't leave me alone. Then it occurred to me that on the top of an unsanitary washing machine in the basement of our building in not the ideal location for a sexual encounter, specifically a first sexual encounter. I am sorry for that. However, the lack of sanitary conditions has continued to bother me exponentially. God only knows what you were sitting on naked, and that is simply unacceptable." His twitch grew faster as he talked, his hands wringing in the soapy cloth he held.    
  
Penny's face softened, a smile breaking out. "Aw, Sheldon, that's really sweet that you're so concerned for me. But they're washing machines. I'm sure they're clean, right? And our first time was perfect. I mean it."   
  
Sheldon smirked his condescending smile at her. "Oh, Penny, Penny, Penny. Washing machines clean the contents, not the outside of their own units. Who knows what kinds of awful things were waiting there? If people haven't washed their hands but then decided to do their laundry after say... handling chemicals or using the restroom... there could be all kinds of-"   
  
Penny turned around, bearing her bottom again with much less finesse than the last time. "Clean me!" she demanded, not wanting to think about what could be there.    
  
Sheldon smiled, sinking to his knees behind her. "Gladly."    
  
The soapy roughness of the cloth rubbed up the back of her right thigh first in long, lengthy swipes, harsh enough that she could imagine the bacteria and grime Sheldon described clinging there being washed away with each careful stroke.  He swirled smaller circles over the inside of her thigh, moving just up to crease in her hip but not higher yet. He repeated the process with her other thigh, gently massaging her hamstring. She'd tensed when she imagined all of the awful things on those washers that she'd never thought of before, but with each sure movement of the washcloth she could feel the stress melting away as sure as the dirt was.    
  
He stood behind her, reaching across and grazing her side as he held the cloth out under the spray to be revitalized. She could just barely feel him behind her, and wondered if there really were only mere atoms between them; it was one of her favorite lines from a romance novel she once read. She bet Sheldon could tell her just how close they were to the tiniest, miro- nano-whatever, and she'd find it no less riveting. She watched his long fingers rub the cloth against itself in his one hand, the suds rising up from it... she couldn't help it, she pressed back into his body; she craved the contact. His left arm surrounded her waist immediately, holding her to him: slippery skin against smooth slippery skin. His fingers ghosted over her belly button and she could feel the half-hard firmness of him pressing into her lower back.    
  
He leaned his head over her right shoulder. "I need to finish, please," he whispered huskily. "Perhaps, we can return to this afterwards?"   
  
She rubbed her cheek into his, her eyes fluttering closed at the feel of him. It was always amazing when it was new, she thought, but even so this seemed different. "Absolutely," She whispered, her lips moving against the water drenched skin of his neck.    
  
His body slid down hers with the most delicious slippery sensation, the fingers of his left hand brushing the curls between her legs before he brought it down to her left hip to steady himself. Penny closed her eyes as her started rubbing small circles across her hip, then onto the round of her ass, swirling across both cheeks gently with her wash cloth. She moaned as she felt the pressure of his knee and left hand spreading her legs apart, opening her wider to him. Two gentle fingers traveled slowly between the cheeks of her ass, cleaning with gentle swipes.     
  
She flinched when she felt his two fingers rubbing around her asshole in gentle circles, but when he lingered there for longer than she was comfortable with, she clenched her cheeks and pushed forward, away from his touch. "Um, Sheldon," she started, quite uncomfortable with his ministrations.    
  
"Yes?" He asked, his right hand slowly drifting up and down her ankle.    
  
"I'm not really big into that. In fact, I'm not into that at all. That's kind of... an... 'out' hole for me." She smiled sadly, afraid of what her rejection might do so early in their encounters. "Maybe we could skip that this time?" She looked over her shoulder cautiously.    
  
Sheldon's face was open and earnest as he lifted his hands to grip her hips and pull her closer to him again. "I'm sorry- I was not suggesting anything regarding anal intercourse. I was simply trying to be thorough in my ministrations." His fingers rubbed small circles into the crests of her hip bones, one smooth and gentle, the other rough and cloth covered. "I didn't mean to cause you discomfort. Should I continue or would you like to take over?" He lifted his hand and held the cloth out to her over her hip.    
  
"You," Penny said, returning to her former spread form, smiling. She didn't know of any guy that would have said what Sheldon just did in any sort of way that she would have believed. But she believed Sheldon. It made her smile. His hand held the cloth higher, once again rinsing it and then manipulating it so that a different part of the cloth was open to the air, ready to move across her skin.    
  
It disappeared from her sight and she moaned as she felt it's coarseness rub across her labia, pushing gently around and rubbing at a pace that was just slow enough to be maddening. She threw her head back and arched into him as a slim cloth-covered finger found its way between her lips, rubbing up and down from her moist entrance to the hardened nub of her clit.    
  
"Sheldon..." she moaned, pushing into his hand as it swiped across her clit again.    
  
"Penny, is this turning you on?" He asked, slightly confused, stopping his movements.    
  
"Oh yes. Yes, it is." She moved her hips, trying to find the rhythm he'd had before he stopped.    
  
"It isn't designed to accomplish that. I was simply trying to be thorough..." He whispered, his hand moving again. He sounded puzzled, and when his hand started changing rhythms and pressures she idly wondered if he was experimenting on her.    
  
She rode the sensations out; they were so much better than the damn washing machine, or any vibrator she'd ever owned. Her hands balled into fists and came together on the tile wall so she could rest her head against them, her hips still pushed out, her legs spread as she pressed into Sheldon's magical hands.    
  
"You're fascinating," he whispered reverently, gently dragging the cloth back over her hip and around to the front of her mound. He slowly stood, quickly soaping up her sides and stomach as he did, his chest sliding slickly up her back. "Every breath you take in ecstasy makes me want to repeat the process, makes me want to find another way to make you feel that sensation again." His cloth covered hand gently cupped one beast, then the other, swirling gentle circles and teasing her hardened and sensitive nipples.    
  
She hadn't noticed his left hand sneaking around her hip until he slid two fingers into her. She arched back into his chest when he began to move them inside her, pushing her hips down... down... down, wanting more than he was giving her. Penny reached behind her, curling her right hand around his neck and her left hand traveled low, grasping his thigh. "Sheldon," she whimpered as he varied the speed, moving faster and slower in some pattern that she couldn't decipher.    
  
"You're beautiful when you're breathless." Sheldon leaned down to whisper in her right ear as she tuned her head into him. He felt her contract around his fingers, her back arching and the muscles of her legs clenching as she orgasamed.    
  
He slowly pulled his fingers out of her body, away from the softly spasming channel, lifting them away from her body to rinse in the downpour of water before he pushed his wide hand across her stomach, rubbing gentle circles. She relaxed back into his body, moving and snuggling into him as the sensations slowly receded.    
  
She licked her lips, eyes still closed. "Sheldon, don't take this the wrong way- but where did you learn to do that?"   
  
He took the hand towel he'd been using to clean her and draped it across the basket of her shower caddy, returning his arm around her ribs. "What do you mean?"   
  
Her voice was still breathy as she clung to him. "I just, I figured you'd never had much interest, or experience, with women."   
  
He kissed up the side of her neck slowly. "'Much' is quite different from 'any', and 'experience' is also quite different from 'interest.' I did go through a pubescent period wherein I was ruled nearly exclusively by my hormones. Granted, that was a very short period and I was also continually busy with other things, but I did take an interest. While my experience is not extensive, it was enough to give me the basic idea of the act in intercourse. Also, it is not very hard to find out about the female anatomy, or what brings a woman to orgasm. The most telling, however, is how you react to each thing that I do." He leaned down, nudging her wet, clingy hair away from her neck with his nose, his lips tantalizingly brushing her skin. "Like any good scientist, I observe your reaction to my action, take note, and then try to repeat the procedure. The scientific method never fails."   
  
Penny took a deep breath, finally regaining some equilibrium as she came down from her high. She grinned and turned out of the embrace, pushing Sheldon against the side wall of the shower with an evil glint in her eye; a lioness stalking her prey. "How about I test some theories?"   
  
Sheldon smirked. "Penny, you mean 'hypotheses,' theories are-" he gasped deep and shivered when she grabbed his cock roughly, massaging the head with her thumb. "P-p-p-p- Penny..."    
  
She smiled at how easily she had derailed his train of thought. "Sheldon, have you ever had a blow job?"     
  
His eyes locked with hers, wide and uncertain. "No," his voice was small, slightly stunned. "I uh," He took shallow, heavy breaths as she continued moving her hand, her other gently teasing over his nipples and his chest. "I um, was led to believe that though a typical male fantasy, fellatio is not an act many women enjoy performing." He let out a deep moan as she let her grip slacken, gently dragging her nails across the underside of his member.    
  
"I'm not just any woman, Sheldon. I'm a big ol' five." She smiled, licking her lips as she sunk down to her knees, taking him in her mouth. He threw his head back in ecstasy.    
  
Sheldon was unprepared for the sensations coursing through his body. His sexual experience boiled down to one overzealous co-ed lab partner while he'd been working on his second PhD. The encounter had lasted one night, had been mostly uncomfortable, unpleasurable, and awkward and left him with the desire never to repeat the process again. Until Penny.    
  
His fingers clutched at the slippery tile behind him. Every time he opened his eyes he could see the room spinning, so he kept them tightly closed. The feel of the warm wetness of her mouth was more pleasurable then he could have ever fathomed. He felt the strong pulsing of her tongue running over him, the occasional gentle rasp of her teeth, the vibration when she hummed deep in her throat that shot up his spine.    
  
He recited the periodic table of the elements to himself, constructed a schematic for a viable time travel flux capacitor, and recited pi until he lost count of the decimal places when a zero degraded into a mental moan. He wanted to make it last longer, wanted to find a way to make it last forever.    
  
As his heart rate rose he began to panic. Surely orgasming in her mouth would not be the gentlemanly thing to do. Surely that wasn't what she wanted, though her actions seemed to say differently. He thought back to the few pornographic films he'd seen and how the woman had been prostrated under men, mouths and faces covered in ejaculate as the men orgasmed. He didn't want that for Penny- he never wanted to see her debauched like that, especially by his own hand. Or penis. Panic rose in him tide and his hands fought to push her away. "Stop! Penny, stop!"    
  
The terror in his voice alarmed her. She pulled back and stood, hands rubbing gentle circles on his chest, trying to gauge what had just happened when seconds before he'd been enjoying what she was doing. "What's the matter?" She asked, nearly in a panic herself.    
  
His breath hitched, and he found it hard to look at her, but his eyes sought hers out anyway. "I don't want to- I mean, I can't- You shouldn't-"    
  
"It's ok," she sighed, her panic ebbing just slightly. She had never seen him so flustered and yet unable to convey the problem before. "I didn't hurt, you, did I?" He shook his head, his hands coming to gently rest on her hips. "Was it... too much?" Her question was cautious, and she pushed a strand of wet hair out of her eyes.    
  
He nodded. "Yes, I… I'm not prepared to..." He took a deep breath and looked away from her, "Not quite yet."    
  
She leaned in, kissing him gently. "It's ok." She kissed him again. "I understand." Her hands tangled in his short, wet hair. "It's starting to get cold. Maybe we should get out?"    
  
He nodded sharply. "You go ahead. I have not yet completed my ablutions. I will join you as soon as I am done. We should probably discuss this... change... in our relationship."   
  
Penny could still feel his erection between them, hot and pulsing against her stomach. "But, Sheldon... Don't you want to..." She rubbed her hips into his, his length trapped between them.  He groaned as she lifted her eyebrows suggestively, "...you know, finish?"   
  
A blush traveled from Sheldon's shoulders, up his neck and across his cheeks. "I believe it is in everyone's best interest if I take care of that small matter myself. Then we will be able to discuss everything with clear minds."    
  
The shower was rapidly cooling, barely even qualifying as warm now. She reached between them with one hand and grabbed his pulsating length, her other falling against Sheldon's lips, stopping any objections he might have. "Close your eyes," she whispered. "Relax. Don't think, just feel." She could feel his lips moving, trying to get a protest out between her fingers so she leaned in, claiming them with her own.    
  
Her tongue pushed its way in his mouth, mirroring the rhythm she set with her hand. She felt his body relax and curl into hers just slightly, his arms winding around her. Penny let her mouth travel to the shell of his ear. "Help me, Sheldon, show me what you like." She licked the crest and felt the shiver that traveled down his body. "Put your hand on mine, like when I showed you. Show me, Sheldon." Her lips found his again, intent on keeping him from thinking too much.    
  
His hand tentatively slipped around her waist and down her abdomen until it rested on hers. She'd slowed as he neared, waiting for him to take the lead. His hand gently clutched hers, but didn't move any farther. She pulled her lips away from his, resting their foreheads together. "Sheldon. Move me. Show me. I want to see you beautifully breathless, too."    
  
His eyes found hers with those last words, astonished and intense. They shone bright blue, droplets of water dripping gently from his lashes. Penny felt time stand still. His hand gently readjusted around hers, then softly pulled and pushed until she fell into rhythm with him. His eyes never left hers as their arms clutched each other tighter.    
  
His breath began to hitch as the water started to turn truly cold, stinging droplets bombarded their overheated skin as his, and her, movements got rougher. Longer, harder strokes were punctuated with the feel of her fingers changing direction and pressure. The feel of her small hand under his, her tiny thin fingers an entirely different sensation than he was used to. His other hand moved up her shoulder until he cupped the back of her head, holding her to him with their foreheads and noses pressed together as he panted, spraying cold water and warm breath over her collarbone.    
  
His eyes squeezed shut when he came, his lip clenched between his teeth as he struggled not to groan out loud and his hand abandoned hers to squeeze her hip. His fingers twisted in her hair and his body shook against hers for long, slow seconds as she held his convulsing member in her hand, trying to memorize every nuance of the moment. His warm, white seaman that had spattered against her abdomen and thigh was slowly washed away by the cold water as they stood there catching their breath.    
  
Sheldon's eye's opened slowly as he moved his hands to frame her face. He kissed her with the single minded intensity that she'd only ever seen him reserve for science. When she pulled back and smiled, he mirrored her actions. She reached over, grabbing the unused washcloth. "Cucumber Melon or Vanilla cream, and let's make this quick!" She reached the cloth under the icy spray and bounced in front of him, his hands still on her hips. When he didn't reply she knit her eyebrows together. "I assume you still want to clean up? And it's only going to get colder, so let's make this quick. Do you want to smell like vegetables or a spice?"    
  
He didn't have the heart to correct her, and found that he couldn't even string the words together to reply to her inaccuracy with any kind of authority. The paradigm shift had happened so suddenly, but also so easily, that he was still in a tailspin. Yet, he wasn't panicking, wasn't actively upset, and didn't see this as anything bad or disruptive. Oddly, he felt like there was something intensely right about the changes that had taken place today. Logically he knew that there would be problems they'd have to face and lots of logistics to work out, but in this moment, he couldn't seem to care. He simply looked forward to the feeling of Penny soaping him up, and to wrapping the fluffy yellow towel hanging on the rack behind the curtain around her. He parroted her words from earlier back at her. "Surprise me."   
  
Penny poured more Vanilla Cream than necessary on the cloth and scrubbed it between her hands to create the suds. A twinkle sprung to her eyes as she smiled, even though goose bumps were breaking out on her arms.    
  
"Bend over, please," she commanded with a sultry smile that contained a hint of mischief, mimicking his first words to her as he'd stepped into the shower.    
  
Sheldon found he could do nothing but comply. "Yes, Ma'am."


End file.
